About Me

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I'm a student of Lasalle College of The Arts, Singapore. I'm studying Graphic Design. I'm Indonesian, but for the time being I'm residing in Singapore due to my course of study.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Long Distance Relationship

Long Distance Relationship...*sigh*...Jeezz, about 3 or 4 months ago that was probably the phrase that I dreaded so much. The thought of not being there with my boyfriend, the thought of goodbye, the thought of losing communication and everything. I dreaded everything about LDR. Hmm, but now, as time passes by, as I'm going through this "Long Distance Relationship"....well, I think it's not that bad :)


Sure I can't be with my boyfriend, sure now I am not be able to do A LOT OF THINGS together with my boyfriend anymore, definitely sure we are APART, exactly continents and 4 hour time difference apart, but hey, all of those things are just the tip of the iceberg. Everything is about perspective, when you look at LDR that way, and I mean the sad I-can't-be-with-my-boyfriend or we're-apart cry-cry-cry, trust me, you won't even survive 1 month of LDR.

How about we look at things this way. Yes, I can't be with him, but I can still talk to him, I can still see his face everyday on Skype-Video Call. In fact, I AM GRATEFUL. Out of everything, I still have the opportunity and resources to see his face everyday. Not everyone can get that kind of opportunity. I mean, back in the old days, couples have to survive LDR only with letters, telegrams, and emails (as the technology progressed. Hell, now I can TALK and SEE his face through Video Call, that's a big thing ! I mean, compared to the old days, I'm lucky, very lucky.

Yes, we'll be apart. But maybe, us being apart is what make us stronger. Being apart will trial your loyalty, your patient and your love for your boy/girlfriend. Maybe after all of this ends, after we finally can be together, our relationship will be stronger than ever. Why ? because we have survived such big obstacle like LDR, if we can survive it, maybe we are meant to be together.

And the thing about LDR, you can not live with in complaints. Just be grateful for what you have, be patient and be loyal and as loving as ever to your boy/girlfriend.

And BELIEVE, believe that everything will be better in time. Believe in you boy/girlfriend, and more importantly, believe in God.



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Oh No...I think I'm a Social Network Addict

Online - Saykoji

Siang malam ku selalu menatap layar terpaku untuk online - online - online - online. --> Gw abis, yep siang - malem online trus, ga di kampus ga di rumah. wkwkwk.

Tidur telat bangun pagi pagi, nyalain komputer online lagi, bukan mau ngetik kerjaan, email tugas diserahkan.Tapi malah buka facebook padahal face masih ngantuk, beler kaya orang mabuk, pala naik turun ngangguk - ngangguk. ---> BENER ABIS ! gw tiap pagi bangun dr tempat tidur, nyalain komputer cuman buat nge-tweet "just woke up" ato nyalain torrent lagi. wkwkwk.

Sambil ngedownload empitri, colok iPod, USB kiri. ---> Yep, gw download lagu, film, kadang program juga. wkwkwk. iPod ga ada sih, tp flashdisk iya. wkwkwk.


Ngecekin postingan forum, ape ade balesannye? Belum. ---> DULU sih iya wkt msh aktif di forum, skrg ga tuh.

Biar belum sikat gigi belum mandi tapi kalo belum online paling anti. Liat friendster, myspace, youtube, me and HIM, everybody you too. ---> Ironically ini ada benernya juga, tapi GW CUMAN BUKA FACEBOOK, no friendster - myspace.

Siang malam ku selalu menatap layar terpaku untuk online - online - online - online. Jari dan keyboard beradu, pasang earphone denger lagu, aku online online - online - online. ---> YEP ! that's me ! wkwkwk

Nah uda mandi siap berangkat, langsung cabut takut terlambat.---> Yep, sempet - sempetnya nyalain komputer padahal lagi buru - buru biar ga ketinggalan bus.

Tak lupa flashdisk gantung di leher, malah lupa sepatu jadi nyeker. ---> KLO INI NGGAK YAH ! gw ga ngegantung flashdisk di leher kyk bapak - bapak kantoran gt !

Flashdisk isinya bokep ato lagu ---> NOPE, flashdisk gw isinya bersih, klo ga film blockbuster atau series yah data sekolah.

Kalo ada kerjaan pun gue ragu, kalo emang berani coba pada ngaku, cek isi foldernya satu satu. ---> Ih, cek aja sana ! beneran ada kerjaan sekolahnya. wkwkwk.

Di kantor online pake proxy, walau diblok server bisa dilolosi. ---> Untungnya sih di kampus gw internet ga di-block2 tuh. wkwkwk.

Namanya udah ketagihan internet, produktifitas pun kepepet. Jam kerja malah chatting YM, ngobrol online sama ehehem. Atasan lewat langsung klik data pura pura kerja didepan mata. ---> INI BENER !

Makan siang pun aku cari sinyal wi - fi ---> Aduh, bener banget. Dimana pun gw makan, gw nyari Wireless@SG. wkwkwkwk.

Mengapa ku kecanduan oh why why. Kadang terasa bagai tak berdaya, ingin ku berubaah... Eh, ada email uda dulu ya. ---> This is just plain hilarious. wkwkwk.

Cek email spam semua, email benerannya cuma dua, yang satu email lama yang satu forward-an yang sama. ---> Bener abis ! isi email cuman notifications dr twitter ato facebook ! wkwkwk.

Ngarep komentar buka friendser ---> FACEBOOK ! NOT FRIENDSTER !!!

Loading gua tinggal beser, pas balik ngecek komputer kok lagi maintenance server. ---> palingan internet hostel sih yang lagi ngajak berantem.

Yauda download lagu, bajakan gratis gak pake ragu. ---> skrg sih hobby-nya download film.

Saykoji satu album, setengah jam bisa rampung. ---> sayangnya download film paling cepet selese 1 hari...

So what do you think guys ? Should I get some help ? wkwkwk

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Life in Singapore So Far

Hi guys, as you know, I live in Singapore now, I'm studying Design Communication at Lasalle College of The Arts, and I intend to take Advertising Design as my specialization in Level 3. So that is a little introduction for you all.

Life in Singapore has been pretty good so far. New place, also new culture. There things that I found really interesting, and that is why I want to share them in this note :)


First, in my college, the lecturers don't want to be called by "Mr" or "Ms" or whatever, I found this very weird you know. Calling your teacher with their names, as if you are friends. That never happened to me in Indonesia.

Second, Singapore is a country FULL of RULES !!! Wherever you go, you'll see do-not sign, like, EVERYWHERE ! Don't do this and that, don't bring this and that, Fine SGD 1000, or whatever. Now I'm kinda getting used to all of those rules. I know rules are important, keep us in order, make a better life or whatever. But sometimes, I think people also need to have a little fun too, don't you think ? Just a little kind reminder for Singaporean, "Don't forget to have fun once in awhile, get out of the country if you can !"

Third, in Singapore, this part comes in my behalf, me coming from Indonesia and whatever. Well, how can I say this... EVERYTHING IS SO DAMN EXPENSIVE !!! Shampoo, soap, clothes, shoes, food, drinks, EVERYTHING !!! I don't get why Indonesians come here every year to shop, PEOPLE, IT'S MUCH MORE EXPENSIVE HERE !!! DUHH ??!!

Fourth, I like Singapore's public transportation service very much. They're easy, accessible everywhere, simple, functional and practical. They have this card called EZLINK, you can store your balance there and use it for any kind of public transportation (bus, MRT, LRT), you can even use it in 7 Eleven stores.

Fifth, in Singapore, I find it easier and cheaper just to buy food from outside then cooking. Cooking takes a lot of time, but that doesn't mean that I won't cook ever. Just that, maybe not now, maybe in holidays or Project Weeks where I'll have lots of spare times. I will learn how to cook ! I will and I must !

Oh, one thing about buying food outside...this part is a bit annoying to me. I frequently stumbled upon some difficulties when buying food outside. Sometimes, the auntie or uncle CAN'T SPEAK ENGLISH !!! What kind of people living in Singapore nowadays that can't speak english ? Now when this problem surfaces, you have no choice but to use.....the sign languange.....Let me give you some examples, sometimes it's like : "NUMBEEEERRRR TWOOO !!! TWOOOO !!! NUMBER TWOOOOO !!!" *desperately pointing at the menu picture*, or sometimes you just poke and point desperately at your choice of menu.

Okay, my friend came to my room when I wrote this and asked me to accompany him cook noodles downstair, so I left it and when I came back my writing mojo was gone....Hmm...I think I'll leave it here...Hahahhaa...(such a cliffhanger)

Oh and by the way (I just remembered this as I reposted this post from my facebook notes), did you know that in Singapore they CHARGE you for RECEIVING CALLS ? Yeah....but in the good side, the operators here are quite nice, they have like top up for 28 dollars and you got 100 dollar bonus ! or top up 15 dollars and get 30 dollar in bonus. Nice, eh ? :)

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Friday, June 5, 2009

You Just Have to Let it Go

For these pas few weeks, I've been struggling inside. Why ? Well, maybe because I realized that my time is almost up. I'll be going to Singapore on July 26th. Meaning,no more hanging out with my friends, and worst....I can't be there with my boyfriend. Since the first time we hooked up, we knew that we're going to have to do long distance relationship, because I'm going to Singapore and he's going to New Zealand. I know that I have to be strong, I suppose to have faith and everything. But the thing about fear, it's just...amazing how fear can get you, makes you doubt everything, makes you pessimistic. So last night, I finally had the chance to talk to my boyfriend about this. And, I just feel enlightened. He reminded me of something that is so important, that I forgot, the most fundamental thing, is that, "you just have to let it go".


Everything in this world, our car, our stuff, our lovers, they're not ours ! They're God's. That's why He can take it away from us anytime He wants. I realized, "why do I have this terrible fears ?", maybe it's because I was holding everything too tight. I felt that that is mine, I fought my way for it, and I deserved it ! Well, I was wrong.

I have to let it go, the more you hold on to something, the more pain you'll have. Like what my boyfriend always said, "Have faith in God, everything is for the best". He's right, even if I won't get what I want, maybe it's for the best. Maybe God has a bigger and better plan for me. And even if my boyfriend and I do not make it in the future, maybe it's for the sake of us too, maybe God has a different plan for us. And there's no point on fighting God's will, believe everyhting is for the best.

The best thing that happened last night was, we made a deal, that if we really do break up in the future, the worst thing we can be is "best friend". I thank him for that. He's so precious to me, but I have to realize that he's not mine. I have to realize that whatever happen in the future, it's for our best.

But that doesn't mean that I won't fight for him, that if one problem come up, I'll just give up, NO ! You to fight for what you love, but you have to know when to quit to. You have to know when it's time to let go.

A lesson well learned, thank you Thomas, and thank you God.

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Wednesday, June 3, 2009

National Exam

Like every 12th grade student, I also enrolled in the late National Exam, it's compulsary in fact. I have many disappointments on the late National Exam, I practically made a note on Facebook to outleash my rage. I think I'm just going to copy it here. The note is titled, "Ujian Nasional Matematika tingkat SMA/MA 22 April 2009".


I could probably come up with 10 facebook status' just to show you guys how bloody irritating today's Mathematic National Exam was, but I can't post them all, so I thought, why not put them all in a note ? So here we go....

1. I think I'm going to kill Bambang Sudibyo, anybody want to join me ?

2. I could find the answer for all of those fucking questions, I JUST NEED BLOODY MORE TIME !!!

3. When you ask me to search for a variant, didn't you think that 16 numbers are too many ? Oh but wait, I forgot that National Exam purpose in the first place was to torture High School student, so never mind....

4. I thought I was the one who didn't manage to finish the fucking exam, turned out, I wasn't alone, in fact, it was EVERYONE !!!

5. ARE YOU HAPPY BAMBANG SUDIBYO ???!!! It's really fun to torture high school kids, isn't it ? What are you some kind of bloody asshole psychopath ? You got some issues back then with your daddy, huh ?!

6. No point in doing all of those bloody Try Outs if we ended up even worse in the National Exam !

7. Want to know the difference between Try Outs and National Exam ? National Exam is supposed to be EASIER !!!

8. Hey Bambang Sudibyo ! what, you have some kind of death wish ???!!!

9. My sympathy goes to the IPA's students...I know you guys bear a bigger burden and torture than we ( the IPS's students) do...

10. An advice from Bambang Sudibyo, or whoever made this fucking math test, IT'S A TWO HOUR TEST !!! Students are human, not a bloody robot who can work on one question in a minute ! Next time, try easier and simpler questions or at least GIVE US MORE TIME !!!

This is an additional point....

It's not that WE DIDN'T STUDY HARD, in fact, WE DID STUDY....REALLY HARD !!! The test was not that difficult too, I can say that I could find the answer to all of the questions IF I HAD MORE TIME. So whoever read this note, mind that it's not our fault, for we have study really hard, and we have done our best. It's the matter of the complication of the questions, they required MUCH TIME to work on. Conclusion ? back to my point number 10, either you make a SIMPLER questions or GIVE US MORE TIME !!!

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I have a boyfriend now !

I would like to start my comeback by updating my relationship status. I know it's late, since the event was actually happened in February, but what the heck. So, if you've read my blog, you know that I've posted one or two articles about this guy, and now that he's my boyfriend, I think I can say it out loud that the guy's name is Thomas.


Jeez, quite a history I have with this guy. Almost 1 and a half year. We started out as friends, then became best friends and so on. I was waiting for so long, and now my wait is over. He confessed to me about his feelings on February 9th 2009. It's the day when we became boyfriend and girlfriend. My happiest day so far.

And now, we have been in a relationship for almost 4 months. I'm very happy, he's always there for me, and he's just such a nice guy. I love him, and although we will be apart for the next 4 years, I hope that our relationship will last.

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I'm Back

Wow it's really been a long time. I was so busy with exams and everyhthing, I seemed to forgot about my blog. Well, it's holiday now, and I think it's time to pay my debt. Where should I begin ? So many things to tell...




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Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Not now, not yet....

I've deleted my three previous post (A Letter for Him, 7 Days, and 7 Things). I just thought that now is not the right time yet. I don't know when.....maybe sometimes in the future, or maybe I would not even have the chance......who knows...Everything is a blur, yet it is so clear. It is so simple, yet he makes it so complicated. Maybe I no longer care.....maybe I was wrong all along the way.....maybe this was actually not meant to be.....who knows ?

"Who knows where the road will lead us ? Only a fool would say.....but if you let me love you, it's for sure I'm gonna love you....all the way...."

All the Way - Frank Sinatra



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Wednesday, October 15, 2008

My First Web Project


Temu Kolese's 2008 official website. Made by the collaboration of Gonzaga College and Canisius College. We finished this website in 2 and a half days.

Temu Kolese's logo was designed by Bhima (De Britto College).

Design by : Albert Santoso, Ruth Afrita, dan Willyam O.S.

Script by : Nico R., Julius Arden, dan Andrew Santoso.

Animation by : Ari Adiprana dan Wira.

Data by : Secretariat TEKOl and TEKOL Website team.


This was my first web project, and also my first time working in one creative team. But for the other Canisius kids, this is like their second, or third, or I don't know. lol. It's cool how we complete each other. I personally is not able to create and develop a website. My only duty in this team was designing the layout. This project was started with Albert creating the base font and typography for temu kolese 08, and me, also William, developing it as a web layout. At first nobody noticed Albert's idea, but then I took a glance at it and straightly thought that it was a good design. Then I asked Albert to join me n\in developing the layout, after that William came and helped us too.

At first, our works seemed to have not gain any people attention for Nico had already made a blog design for Temo Kolese's website. But in the end, our works has finally paid off. The team liked our design and decided to go with it as the one to use. Albert, William, and I worked entirely on Adobe Photoshop CS3. And as for the script, and animation, we left all of that to Nico, Ari, Andrew, ad Julius.

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Friday, September 26, 2008

Dedikasi untuk 26 September 2008

Ehhmmm...If I may say...*halaahh...sok2 pk bhs inggris sgala*...Eniweii...Post kali ini, akan gw dedikasikan, untuk tanggal 26 September 2008. Kenapa ? Ada beberapa hal kenapa...dan hal - hal berikut akan gw jabarkan...


Today, I've learned of things, one of them came as a shock to me *literally*...my heart nearly stopped, I, up until now, still refuse to believe in this "one thing"...

Okay, Lesson number one :

I just discovered, mungkin ga "just discovered" yah...gw udh tahu dr lama, klo gw tuh...BUTA JALAN, BUTA JAKARTA !!! Gw udh nyadar sih dari lama klo gw tuh buta Jakarta, hanya saja...pengalaman hari ini telah menegaskan dan menguatkan, and emphasized it...hehehe...Sumpah td gw pas ngelewatin gedung2 perkantoran tuh kek ank kampung baru masuk kota aja ! lo harus tanya temen gw aldo ! hahaha...kasian bgt tu org, hrs bersama gw di mobil selama lbh dr 2 jam ! Wakakakak...

Lesson number two :

EPSON dan FUJITSU itu di SAMPINGNYA BIZNET YAH !!! dan....FABER CASTELL tuh di JAKARTA BARAT !!! dan...CONCEPT MEDIA tuh di MENTENG DALAM, alias...TEBET/PANCORAN !!! Akhhh....udh jauh2 pergi...hahaha...g taunya nyasar...zzzzzzzzzz

Lesson number three :

Internet, especially BLOG, is not a smart place to share your personal and secret stories with....haaaaahhh....Gw cmn bisa cerita itu. Cerita lebih banyak lagi, gw hanya akan mengulangi kesalahan gw 2 kali...hahahaha...

Jadi, inilah 26 September 2008 bagi gw....dedikasi ku, kepada 26 September 2008.

Selesai. Wkwkwk.

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Thursday, September 25, 2008

UPH Sialaaaaaannnn !!!

First of all, for those who in anyway connected or affiliated to UPH, and are offended by my notes in any possible way...I'm sorry, but no offense, this shit actually happened to me and my friends ! So I'm not just going to sit around and act like nothing happened !


Berikut, hal2 yg bkin gw sgt pissed off dan kesel bgt sm UPH, dan sumpah gw ilfeel abis !!!

1. Pada saat gw, ayeq, thomas, leandro, archie, cherry, farandi dtg ke admission officeny UPH :

ruth : mbak, ini kita mo dftr...

mbak admission 1 : ohh, iya2...mm, sbntr ya dek....*lalu kita dialihkan ke loket mbak admission no 2, yg mukany sumpah jutek mampus !!!

mbak admission 2 : mo ngembaliin form ? *msh dgn muka jutekny* mapnya mana ?

Ayeq : ohh ini kita dftrny online mbak.

mbak admission 2 : ini smuanya online *smbl nunjuk ke 6 org ank gonz lainny* ?

Ayeq, ruth : Iya mbak.

mbak admission 2 : Bagussss !!! *dgn nada ketus, jutek, san sumpah NYOLOT abisss !!!*

mbak admission 2 : ya udh, satu2 yah dftrny. yg lainny tolong duduk di sana. *dgn nada yg g enak*

Complain gw : SUMPAH ! UPH GA BISA CARI PETUGAS ADMISSION YG LBIH RAMAH APA ????!!!! Paling ga yg g nyolot yah !!! ptugas kek gituan tuh sharusny ramah !!! bukan nyolot !!! Pecat aja tuh org !!! Staff admission yg shift tgl 19 sept 2008 jam 3 sore namanya Irma !!!! Wuarghhh !!!! *emosi bgt gw*

2. Time pass by, tmn gw ayeq dftr dgn lancar, thomas jg dftr dgn lancar...lalu tiba giliran gw....

mbak admission 2 (irma) : udh bawa 3 gmbr portfolio yg dtndtngn kepsek n dicap, sama essay yg ditulis tangan blm ?

gw : hah ?! Lohh, bknny cmn disuruh 1 yah mbak ? di applicationny termsny cmn ditulis ONE PORTFOLIO (DRAWINGS) SIGNED BY ART TEACHER AND STAMPPED. Dan ga ditulis apa2 tuh soal HANDWRITTEN ESSAY ?!

Irma : *smbl ngluarin file, nunjukin surat* Iya, ini ditulis kok. Permintaan dr fakultasnya, 3 gmbr portfolio, essay yg ditulis tangan.

gw : TP INI DI APPLICATION TERM-NY GA DITULIS APA2 TTG ITU ???!!! trus gmn dong mbak ?

Irma : *dia nanya ke tmnny di smpg* ehh, lo td pas ad ank design yg apply tp g bw 3 portfolio sm essay tulis tangan lo apain ? LO SURUH BALIK YAH ? *dgn nada ketus n nyolot*

Complain gw : First, sumpah ! ini Irma nyolot abis sihh !!! dia ngmg kek gt di dpn gw !!! Arghhh !!! kesel bgt gw !!! mati aja lo !!!! UPH ga bisa cri ptugas admission yg lbh ramah apaaaaa ???? Second, gw kesel bgt sm UPH, KENAPA DI APPLICATION TERM YG DICANTUMKAN DI ONLINE ADMISSION GA DITULIS "3 PORTFOLIO DAN 500 WORDS HANDWRITTEN ESSAY" ???? !!! Sbegitu susahnya apa nulis bbrp kata dan syllablegitu ??? hahh ???!!! Asal lo tau aja yah UPH !lo slh nulis kek gt bisa gw tuntut tau ga ! jgn main2 soal peraturan ! apalagi yg soal kek gini ! lo udh merugikan waktu yg gw hbskan utk prgi ke UPH yg nun jauh di sana, lo udh ngabis2in bensin, uang, dan OPPORTUNITY gw !!! tgl 19 sept shrusny gw ad appointment buat Girlfriend magazine utk mnt sponsor media partner bua acr skolah gw...DAN GW HRS CANCEL cmn gr2 UPH !!! GW SHARUSNY BISA NGEDROP PROPOSAL KE KOMPAS DAN CONCEPT MEDIA KLO GA WASTE WKTU GW DI UPH !!!

3. Pas wktu giliran tmn gw, archie dftr. Dan dicek ijazah UAN SMPny...

Irma brengsek : ini ijazah SMPny belum dilegalisir. Harus dilegalisir.

Archie : loh, tp mbak, klo liat di APPLICATION TERMny *blk lg ni kt ke kebegoan UPH dlm membuat terms admission* cmn ditulis "Copy of NEM (UAN) SMP". Ga ditulis hrs dilegalisir. Klo yg soal raport kls 10 - 11 emg ditulis hrs dilegalisir (A copy of High School Academy Record grade 10 to 11 and legalized by the Principal)...tp klo yg UAN SMP ga.

Irma nyolot : Yahh...hrs dilegalisir...SMUA ORG JG TAU KLO DOKUMEN KEK GITU HARUS DILEGALISIR....*ngmgny dgn sangat amat nylot*

Archie : *udh ksel nih* lah, tru gmn dong mbak ?

Irma sialan : ya udh, balik aja tgl 18 okt msh bisa ko.

Archie : Lohh ? yg 18 okt itu bknny deadline yg utk direct admission yah ? yg scholarship deadlineny skrg khan tgl 19 sept ?

Irma : ga ko, diundur 1 bln. Jadi skrg adek blk aja. *dgn ketus*

Complain gw : SUMPAH UPH !!! Kenapa ga bilang dr pertama klo diundur jd tgl 18 okt ???!!! Gw udh ngebatalin appointment gw, ngabisin wktu 2 jam di mobil, ga bs tdur krn mkirin jalan dmn kt nyasar mulu, ngebuang2 bensin, bkin capek, bela2in ke RS Fatmawati buat bkin surat ini itu, dan TERNYATA PENDAFTARANNYA DIUNDUR ?! An***g Lo !!! Asal lo tau aja ! gw dan tmn2 gw bela2in ke UPH hr itu, padahal besoknya ADA UL MID SEMESTER !!! MAT LAGI !!! dan ternyata pendaftaranny diundur ??? Sumpah ! An***g abis lo !!! T*i tau ga !!! F***k !!! Asal lo tau lagi, mlmny, gw br bisa nympe rmh jam stengah 9 ! dan gw ga kuat blajar krn kcapekan ngantuk !!!

Complain kedua gw : di termny UPH cmn nulis "a copy of UAN from Junior High School", ga ditulis jelas itu tuh mintanya SKHUN ato IJAZAH...dan yg jelas, GA MINTA DILEGALISIR yah !!! Sumpah UPH, skali g deh, bkin peraturan yg bner kek ! dan konsisten !!!

4. Asal lo tau aja, UPH kekny buka online admission tu srius ga sih ? Ko pendaftar yg online admission pelayananny sucks gitu ?! Klo yg dftr direct, dpt map, bk panduan dll, yg online admission udh hrs ngeprint sndiri, ga dpt map !!! buku panduan aja ga !!! emg g bisa apa buku panduanny dibkin pdf di webny ? ktnya GLOBAL CAMPUS, gt aja ga bisa ?

Dan yg dftr online dr gonz masa data2ny dimasukin ke map abal yg tulisanny admission 2006, jd kek map bekas gitu !!! arghhh !!!! sumpah nyebelin abisss !!! yg online admission jg byr Rp 300.000 yah !!! WE DESERVE THE SAME SERVICE !!!

Intinya, gw kecewa berat sm UPH. Gedung boleh keren, tp pelayanan n sistemny ancur. BERESIN TUH DULU sblm bangga2in gedung ma fasilitas !!!

Org admissionny sndiri blg *Mbak Vero, yg suka dtg ke EDU Fairny Gonz...yg ini orgny baik n ramah btw, unlike si Irma brengsek* kalo tanggal deadline utk scholarship tuh jg baru keluar tgl 12 SEPT 2008, jd LAST MINUTE BGT yah asal tau aja !!! sistemny ga jls bgt sihh...sumpah gw kecewa abiss...kecewa....ILFEEL MAMPUS GW !!!

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Sunday, August 31, 2008

My Future

Time flies by so quickly...I can't believe I'm in the 12th grade now. It seems like just yesterday was my first day in Gonzaga High school, it seems like just last week I graduated from junior high school. Now I am faced with choices and decisions to make. Lord, I don't think I'm ready for this. Or am I ? Haaahh....You see, I have this plans of my future....


It's not like, I'm-going-to-marry-this-guy plan, or I'm-going-to-have-2-kids kind of plan. Much more simple, yet require a great deal of efforts to achieve. I'm talking about my college/university plan, where I'm going after I graduate high school.

My master plan was I'm going to continue my study in Singapore, I'm going to take Visual Communication (graphic design) as my major. I have already had the university or college that I wanted to go to. NAFA (Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts) and NTU (Nanyang Technological University) are my targets. And of course, I'm looking for schollarship, there's no way I can afford paying all those bills. Even is my parents do have the money. For once, I want to be the one whose there to help. My parents have nurtured me, paid for my living, gave all the things that I wanted. And now, given the opportunity, I want to pay them back, give them my gratitude. The only way I can do that, is by getting a scholarship.

So there was my plan, Singapore, NAFA or NTU. Little that I know that my plan would suddenly change, over some outer influence. There's this scholarship from Japanese Government, called Monbukagakusho. It's 100 % scholarship, they pay your tuition fee, your weekly "huge" allowance, your plane tickets, everything ! You can't ask for any better scholarship, I have to admit the offer is very tempting.

The first time my Japanese teacher offered this scholarship, I didn't even consider it, I thought "it's a waste of time, I could never master Japanese, Japanese is so hard..." and lots of other excuses. Which is to me logical, I mean, If you study in Japan, the living cost is so high, you have to spent at least 2 years in mastering the language, and then you can apply for the university. It's a long and unnecessary process *that's what I thought at the time*.

But like I said, I was influenced by something....or should I say, someone. I had to say, this one thing, was the biggest mistake that I made through out my future plans. Over influenced by this 'someone', I became suddenly interested in the Monbukagakusho scholarship. I knew that the terms for the scholarship is really hard, but I think I was blinded by this 'someone' at that time. I was blinded upon the thought that maybe, If I could get this scholarship and study in Japan, I could be with him, I can be together with him. To think of it now, I was so foolish and naive. I altered my plans just because I wanna be with someone. It's so silly.

What a blessing that I realize before it was too late. Today, I went to Japan Education Fair in JCC. I was stunned by the long and difficult process of this Monbukagakusho scholarship. Everything about that scholarship seems impossible to me, now. I realized that, this is too big for me. I know, for sure, I know it FOR SURE, even if I study my ass to death, even if I cut all of my leisure time for studying, I wouldn't make it. I know confidence is an important thing, that I should never quite before I try, but I think it's more important to be realistic. What I need now, is to face the reality.

Hahahahaha...funny though, I turned my back once on Singapore...now, I'm holding on to it as my future once again. Good bye Japan, you were a wonderful dream, but I know my limit, I know my capacity, and if I have to face the reality and still having my confidence while doing it, Singapore is the best answer. I know it's not as glorious as how I-go-to-college-in-Japan sounds, but it's more realistic. I live in the real world, facing the reality and living it is my duty.

What do I learn from this experience ? Never ever involve your personal feelings to your plans ! Especially your future plans ! Don't go suddenly changing your college/university plan over wanting to be together with some guy. Go your own way ! Live your own dreams ! If he is really for you, then he will be yours by anyhow.

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Thursday, August 28, 2008

August Rush


August Rush.....a film that gives you the true meaning of music, where it can be found, what it can do, what it can give.....I have to admit that I don't know what to say about this movie. This movie practically left me speechless.


I was literally stunned, I was sitting there in my couch, I could do nothing but to stare at the screen, to hear the sound, to hear the music....beautiful is not enough to describe it, amazing is too simple, fantastic is too humble....

Apparently I'm running out of words to describe it...verily, I could not found any word to describe it....All I can say is that this film is amazing, I have never cried over a music before this....I did not cry because of its dramatic and touching story, I simply cried over listening to the music....I was so overwhelmed and amazed, that tears came down from my eyes.

No words from me can do you no good...You should watch it for yourself, hear it, listen it, and be amazed by it...For it will give you the music, like you have never heard of....

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Saturday, June 14, 2008

V's Introduction

Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished. However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition! [slashes a "V" into a Norsefire poster] The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. [giggles] Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me "V".


Hahahahahaha...if there's anybody out there who could understand those sentences above without having to open your dictionary....then please, do tell me. Because I at least had to open my dictionary for every 2 words....hahahahaha

The sentences above are quoted from the film V for Vendetta. A smart, witty, and fantastic film, favored with such a beautiful spirit of politics. A movie definitly worth watching !!! I suggest that you all should watch this movie. Taking all its difference with the graphic novel's version aside...the quality of this film (for me) stands corrected.

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Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Sweet Seventeen


11 April kemarin gw Sweet Seventeen loh....(pamer)....hahahaha...
Despite all the sadness and mental breakdown...I received the greatest of all from my friends...hehehehe....and also from him...


Teman - teman yang datang ke ulang tahun gw kemaren makasih yah...Thanks to : Hesty, Tian, Manda, Fani, Ella, Sekar, Dea, Veta, Thyra, Niken, Lucky, Archie, Aji, Aldo, dan Thomas...Makasih juga buat kado - kadonya.

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Roller Coaster Ride !

Seperti yang gw bilang di post gw sebelumnya, my love life recently is like a roller coaster ride. Satu hari bisa senang, riang, bersemangat, penuh harapan...tapi besoknya bisa langsung down, sedih, kecewa, putus asa...dan rasanya ingin nyerah aja. Satu contoh dari roller coaster ride itu yang paling mengena banget dan bener - bener bikin gw dalem banget...adalah kejadian pas malam sebelum ulang tahun gw yang ke-17. Gila ga tuh ? besoknya sweet 17, tapi malemnya malah ngerasain sedih, kecewa, nyerah dll.


Jadi ceritanya tuh....there's this guy...I like...hahahahaha....

Ruth curhat mode : on
Ruth romantic mode : on
Ruth nostalgic mode : on

Hahahahaha....

Iya, jadi gini...ada cowok yang gw suka. Anggaplah namanya si Oknum X. Gw udah suka sama dia sekitar 6 bulanan...sejak semester 2 klas 2. PDKT ? Udah ko...Hasil ? Nahh...ini dia...soal hasilnya gw ga yakin....hahahahaha...gw pikir dia juga sama - sama suka sama gw...tapi...pada tanggal 10 April 2008, kenyataan berkata lain...

Temennya si oknum X, yang deket sama gw dan yang selalu ngebantuin gw PDKT ma si oknum X ini...dia juga tempat gw curhat tentang si oknum X....banyak dehh jabatannya tuh orang ! Hahahahaha...

Nah, teman oknum X ini cerita ke gw....ini juga dia ceritanya beberapa hari setelah kejadiannya berlangsung. Teman oknum X ini beralasan dia ga tega ngasih tau gw ttg "hal ini". Dia malah pas chatting sempet nanya ke gw, "Ruth...menurut lo...kenyataan tuh lebih baik diketahui ga meskipun menyakitkan ?" Gw bilang, "Iya dong ! Lebih baik menerima kenyataan yang menyakitkan daripada kesenangan semu oleh kebohongan dan ketidaktahuan." Akhirnya....terbukalah pintu realita...

Teman oknum X ini cerita, jadi pas misa angkatan kemarin...dia khan duduk di samping oknum X. Lalu teman oknum X ini nanya ke oknum X, "ehh, X. Lo ko ga jadian aja sihh sama Ruth ?" Lalu oknum X menjawab, "gw lagi ga niat jadian untuk saat ini." Kalau soal dia-lagi-ga-niat-jadian sihh gw udah tau. Dan gw juga ga keberatan dengan hal itu, karena bagi gw yang paling penting adalah "perasaan suka gw terbalaskan".

Lalu...datanglah serangan kedua ! Temannya oknum X nanya lagi ke oknum X, "Hoo...trus kalau gitu, kalau misalnya "nanti" lo mau jadian...jadian sama siapa ? sama Ruth ?" Lalu oknum X dengan gampang dan jahatnya bilang, "ga ahh". Pas denger itu....gw langsung "DEGGG"..."ZLEBB" ! Ga jadian gw ga keberatan...tapi kalo dia udah ga suka, gw ga tahu harus berbuat apa lagi....

Tapi di samping sisi buruknya dari mendengar realita yang satu itu...di sisi lain entah kenapa...gw merasa lega. Kenapa ? Karena...selama ini gw selalu bingung. Bingung apa dia suka sama gw ato gak...bingung apa perlakuan dia yang ini dan itu ke gw tuh merupakan sinyal positif...ato emang gwnya yang kegeeran aja. Gw selalu dilanda kebiingungan kek begitu. Dan saat gw denger "ga ahh" itu...gw mendapatkan jawaban yang pasti. Kebingungan gw selama ini udah terjawab, meskipun jawabannya menyakitkan...tapi paling ga, gw udah ga kebingungan lagi...gw udah bisa lega, karena sekarang semuanya jelas. Ternyata dia ga suka sama gw.

Akhirnya...malam itu juga...malam sebelum ulang tahun gw yang ke-17. Gw membuat keputusan untuk mengakhiri semua ini. Gw memutuskan untuk melupakan dia, dan move on. Saat itu, keputusan gw udah bulat.

Esok hari pun datang, hari saat ulang tahun gw. Gw cerita ke temen sekelas gw, Via dan Veta...lalu gw juga cerita ke temen deket gw (yg jabatan lainnya di sekolah adalah biang gosip), Archie. Tapi dari semua curhat itu...yang paling mengena adalah curhat dengan Via. Kenapa ? Setelah gw bilang ke Via tentang keputusan gw, Via nanya, "Bener nihh Ruth ? YAKIN lo mau ngelepas dia ?". sebuah yes-no question yang sangat mudah dan simpel untuk dijawab....and yet...I couldn't answer it. Gw ga bisa menjawab pertanyaan itu. Gw cuma bisa terdiam...pas denger pertanyaan itu gw tuh langsung "DEGG" ! Suatu bukti dari ketidaksiapan gw melepas dia...tapi apa daya...tidak ada artinya mengejar sesuatu yang tidak bisa didapatkan. Gw berusaha keras ga ketemu sama oknum X dan mencoba ga ngeliat mukanya. Tapi...berhubung waktu itu gw ulang tahun, pasti ada acara SIRAM - SIRAMAN khan...

Pulang sekolah...gw papasan sama dia, trus tanpa gw kira...dia ngasih selamat ultah ke gw....kita salaman gitu. Padahal gw kira dia ga bakal ngasih selamat ke gw. Trus pas gw disirem sama temen - temen gw, dia juga ikut nyiram gw !!! Oh ya dan F.Y.I. gw disiram sama temen - temen gw pake adonan telor + air...lalu ada yang nyirem gw pake kecap asin juga...oh ya, ada juga yang nyirem gw pake ramuan cendol + onde - onde diremukin...dan yang terakhir...ada juga yang nyirem (atau mungkin lebih tepatnya...nyerbukin) gw pake KOPI BUBUK !!! Gile ga tuh ! Hahahahaha....

Oke...gw anggap dia-ngasih-selamat-ke-gw tuh normal...namannya juga "temen" lo ultah, masa ga disalamin....tapi besoknya...ada suatu hal yang lebih menggemparkan lagi !!!

Gw khan bikin acara traktir temen - temen gw gitu, dia termasuk dalam list undangan gw. Kita makannya di Warung Pasta, Kemang. Acaranya simpel...cuman makan - makan aja. Temen - temen gw yang cewek ngasih gw baju ZARA + buku Totto Chan, yang cowok pada ngasih buku. Tapi oknum X ga ngasih...gw juga ga mengharapkan dia ngasih sihh...dan dalam pikiran gw waktu itu, GA MUNGKIN juga dia bakal ngasih gw hadiah. Tapi...little did I know...my thoughts would soon be proven wrong.

Pas acaranya selesai nihh, gw khan ngedrop temen - temen gw ke Gonzaga (sekolah gw) lagi. Nahh temen - temen gw yang cewek dan dia tuh nebeng mobil gw sampe Gonzaga. Nahh temen - temen cewek gw ini mengatur sebagaimana rupa supaya di mobil tuh dia duduk di samping gw. Ga ngobrol apa - apa sihh pas di mobil. Secara gw waktu itu lagi skeptis, putus asa dan dalam usaha untuk melupakan dia. Lalu pas kita sudah sampai di Gonzaga pas temen - temen cewek gw udah pada turun...khan dia turunnya terakhir tuh, soalnya dia duduknya di samping gw. Sebelum dia turun, dia buka tasnya...trus ngambil sebuah kado dan bilang, "nihh". Gw saat itu kaget khan...kaget dan ga percaya. Gw bahkan ga bisa mikir saat itu...mungkin muka gw waktu itu kelihatan kek orang bego kali yah...soalnya waktu itu keknya gw tercengang - cengang dan bingung gitu ! trus dia blg lagi, "baik khan gw ?" sambil senyum. Gw cmn bisa senyum - senyum sambil masih tercengang - cengan.

Itulah turning point bagi gw. Dan saat itu gw sangat sangat bingung ! Di saat gw mo ngelepas dia, dia malah melakukan suatu hal yg bikin gw ga mau ngelepas dia. Ngapain juga ngasih kado ? Bikin orang bingung aja !!! Kenapa gw mempersalahkan banget soal ngasih-kado ini, soalnya...si oknum X ini tuh ga pernah ngasih kado ultah ke orang - orang ! Sama mantannya aja keknya ga dehh...ini yang bikin gw bingung...temen - temennya oknum X pas gw cerita tentang dia-ngasih-kado-ke-gw tuh pada kaget semua gitu. Yahh karena emang si oknum X ini ga pernah (jarang banget) ngasih kado ke orang ! Akhirnya....apa daya...kayaknya emang gw blom siap ngelepas dia dehh....

Bisa aja sihh gw jadi skeptikal dan menganggap bahwa kado itu ga berarti apa - apa...tapi, keknya hati gw memilih untuk mempercayai yang lainnya. Akhirnya...gw ga jadi ngelepas dia dehh....Tapi sekarang gw PDKTnya udah ga segencar yang dulu lagi...karena setiap kali gw berada di samping dia...realita seakan menampar gw, mengingatkan kembali ttg apa yang dikatakannya saat "misa". Jadi sekarang gw lebih menjaga jarak...lebih menahan diri. Dan sekarang gw mencoba santai...mencoba untuk membawa santai semua permasalahan ini. Dengan begitu, gw ga akan stress dan bingung...tapi di lain pihak gw masih bisa menikmati waktu gw saat bersama - sama dengan dia....hahahahaha....

Tak ada salahnya bersenang - senang saat jalan bareng...saat nonton bareng, tanpa harus memikirkan terlalu dalam soal "misa"....Jadi intinya...sekarang gw dibawanya santai aja !!! Hahahahaha....Nahh jadi beginilah Roller Coaster Ride gw !!! Hahahahaha....

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Monday, May 12, 2008

Haloo....Jumpa lagi dengan saya !

おはよう ございます !Buon giorno !
こんばんわ !Buona Sera !
お元気 です か。私 わ 元気 です ねえ。。。Come stai ? E molto bene...Hahahahaha...intinya, "Halo !!! Apa kabar ? Gw baik - baik saja". Hahahahahahaha....Udah lama nih tidak blogging ria....apa kabar bloggers ? Sorry yah blog-ku...ditinggal lama sekali...maaf yaah....


Iya nihh...sudah lama sekali tidak aktif di blog. Hmm..gimana yah ? Entah itu karena lagi malas lahh...atau sibuk lahh...kalau mau disebut banyak sekali alasannya. Hahahahaha....tapi khan yang penting sekarang udah balik lagi nih.

Kalau ditanya apa saja yang terjadi selama siesta (halaahh...pake siesta2 segala...jangan siesta deh, VAKUM...hahahaha) gw selama ini...jawabannya, "Hmm, BANYAK SEKALI !!!". Mulai dari senang, sedih, kecewa, bingung, marah, jengkel, capek....BANYAK dehh !!!

Bisa dibilang...hidup gw akhir - akhir ini...apalagi Love Life gw akhir - akhir ini tuh udah kayak Roller Coaster ! Satu hari sedih, kecewa, dan putus asa...besoknya sudah bersemangat, senang, dan penuh harapan lagi. Begitu terus dan berulang - ulang. Hahahahaha...

Dari yang tadinya sudah mau melepaskan gebetan...besoknya terjadi hal yang terduga. Akhirnya niat terurungi...Yahh seperti itulah...begitulahh....hahahaha

Anyway, dari pada OOT di sini mending nanti gw bikin post tersendiri aja dehh....hahahahaha...

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Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Ul Blok ---> MALES !!!

"Ul blok ? Masih jaman yah ?" Itulah omongan temen gw Lugas pas gw crita klo gw lg ul blok...*iya dehh mentang2 gw masih SMA...masih menderita...hiks*. Iya nihh..sekolah gw sekarang lagi pada Ul Blok gitu...males bgt ! Entah kenapa gw ga ada niat dan mood belajar, jdnya dari kmaren kerjaan gw chatting mulu gitu, bukannya belajar ! Hahahaa...


Mana pas hari pertama Ul Blok itu tuh due date-nya Laopran Live In sama Tugas Ekonomi lagi ! Dan gw begonya ga nyicil dari kmaren - kmaren...yahh..tau lahh...alhasil gw begadang ampe jam stengah 3 ! Tp gw kagung lo sm diri gw...bs ngetik 22 hal dlm waktu kurang dari 1 hari !!! Wakakakakak....tp imbasnya gw ga blajar dehh..hahahaha. Tp untungnya, besoknya tuh cuma ul etika sama mat doang...jd nyantai lahh.Pk sistem SKP (sistem kebut pagi).

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Monday, February 4, 2008

Vektor...


Ini vektor manual gw yang pertama....biasanya khan gw bikin vektor pake cara gampang, yaitu pake adobe illustrator > live trace. Tapi sekarang gw udah mulai latihan dengan cara manual...


Karena cara yang manual itu bisa lebih mengasah kemampuan kita, dan apabila nanti gw kuliah di DKV (desain komunikasi visual), gw harus mem-vektor secara manual. Karena itu mendingan latihan dari sekarang dehh !!!

P.S. : sorry kalo masih acak2an di sana - sini...ini vektor manual yg pertama sih...hehehee...jadi maklum yah...hahahaha...

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Monday, January 21, 2008

GusDur : Guru Bangsa kita


Pernahkah teman2 menyadari akan guru bangsa kita, Gusdur ? Saya yakin teman2 sudah familiar sekali dengan namanya. Ada yang memiliki pemikiran2 negatif saat mendengar nama itu akibat disagreement dengan kebijakan2 saat menjadi presiden, ada juga yg menyandang dia sebagai tak lain dari Guru Bangsa kita, seorang pemikir yang sangat hebat. Saya cenderung untuk memilih yang terakhir. Banyak orang yang menganggap Gusdur dulu sudah gila atau out of his mind karena ingin membubarkan DPR atau ingin memperbolehkan berkembangnya segalam macam agama di Indonesia.


Tapi menurut pendapat pribadi saya, seharusnya kita tidak boleh langsung meng-judge seperti itu. Saya yakin Gusdur telah memiliki pemikiran sendiri atas dasar keputusannya itu. Dulu guru les B.Inggris saya di EF (org Kanada, lulusan Master di Politik, woman with rich knowledge, who I truly respect), pernah bertanya bgini "Who do you think is the best Indonesian President?". Saya menjawab, "Well...don't know..maybe Soekarno ?!". *Saat itu saya msh kurang tertarik dan kurang peduli dengan dunia politik bangsa kita ini*. Lalu guru saya menjawab, "Really ? Cause, I think Indonesia's best president is Gusdur". Saat itu saya kaget, karena pada waktu itu yang saya tahu tentang Gusdur dan pemerintahannya adalah bahwa dulu dia ingin mengubah pancasila dan bahwa dia waktu itu sudah agak "miring". Lalu saya bilang, "Gusdur ?! But he tried to eliminate DPR ?! And he was a bit crazy, frankly speaking ! I mean, who wants to eliminate DPR ?!!". Lalu dia jawab dengan simpelnya "Well, Ruth...sometimes documents need to be changed, don't they ?".

Lalu setelah itu dia bilang bahwa Indonesia itu masih belum siap untuk perubahan. Dan sekarang (1 thn setelahnya), saya baru menyadari bahwa perkataanya tidak lain dari benar. Gusdur itu adalah seseorang yang sangat pintar, seorang pemikir hebat, dari antara pemimpin2 lain dia bisa mengesampingkan keinginan untuk mewujudkan kepentingan pribadinya saja, dan lebih mementingkan negara*tidak seperti pejabat2 dan politisi2 sekarang yg hanya peduli diri sendiri*. Gusdur tidak ragu - ragu untuk mengkritik pemimpin2 lain, tidak ragu untuk membubarkan DPR, dll. Bahkan presiden kita yg sekarang pun akan berpikir seribu kali sebelum menindak sang pemilik Lapindo, krn sang pemiliknya itu tak lebih dr sahabat dan penyokongnya sendiri.

Tidak mudah, teman - teman, sekarang untuk menemukan seorang pemimpin yang tidak takut untuk menindak teman atau sponsornya sendiri, yang tidak terikat oleh beribu - ribu koneksi yang kelebihannya hanyalah mengikat kebijakan yg diambil pemimpin itu sendiri, dan minta - minta jabatan. Gusdur di lain pihak, sepertinya *menurut penglihatan saya yg sejauh ini* tidak ,atau paling tidak, tidak sepenuhnya terikat oleh ikatan2 dan beban2 politik seperti itu. Apabila kita melihat dr sisi positifnya, Gusdur dapat dilihat sebagai sosok Guru Bangsa sejati, yang memiliki pemikiran - pemikiran yg hebat, yg telah berani dan mampu utk melihat kesalahan2 kecil yg dibuat oleh bangsa ini dalam masa kacau balau ini. Gusdur mampu mengusut kembali benang2 masalah bangsa ini yang sudah terlampau kusut, dan menganalisanya, dan mencari sumber masalah, sampai kepada solusinya.

Sangatlah sayang guru bangsa kita ini tidak diberikan kesempatan cukup lama untuk merealisasikan pemikiran2nya dan melakukan tugas & peranannya yg sebenarnya dalam bangsa ini, yaitu untuk menyadarkan bangsanya sendiri. Indonesia *menurut pendapat dan pemikiran saya sendiri* adalah suatu bangsa yang agak konservatif. Indonesia masih belum siap menerima perubahan - perubahan radikal, meskipun perubahan tersebut sebenarnya hanyalah untuk kebaikan dan kemajuan bangsa ini sendiri. Bangsa ini seperti banyak orang bilang "adalah bangsa pelupa". Mungkin krn begitu banyak permasalahan yg telah kita alami, kita dengan mudahnya meluapakan masalah2 itu. Padahal teman - teman, "kenyataan historis" bukanlah sesuatu yang pantas dan boleh untuk dilupakan. Kita seharusnya belajar dr sejarah, hanya dengan cara itulah kita bisa mempelajari keunggulan2 kita dan kesalahan2 kita, sehingga kita tidak akan lagi jatuh di lubang yg sama.

Lupakah kita akan betapa mandirinya bangsa ini saat pemerintahan Presiden Soekarno, saat bangsa ini merupakan bangsa mandiri yg bebas dr utang2 luar negri ? Saat dimana kita berdiri di atas kaki kita sendiri ? Saat tidak ada satu pun dari kebijakan2 politik kita yg harus terikat oleh ikatan utang-politik dengan luar negri ? Dulu kita berani keluar dr PBB !!! Lihatlah contoh itu ! Tidakkah dulu kita sangat bebas ?!

Apabila saya membuat metafora, maka saya akan menggambarkan bangsa Indonesia sebagai seseorang yg sedang berjalan di tengah - tengah kabut yg sangat tebal, dan saking tebalnya kabut itu, orang itu sampai tidak menyadari bahwa Ia telah menjalani sebuah lingkaran setan yg tidak memiliki akhir, Ia tidak menyadari bahwa Ia telah beberapa kali jatuh pada lubang yg sama karena dibutakan oleh kabut tersebut.

Indonesia yg sekarang telah dibutakan oleh ketamakan, ketidakpedulian, dan kebodohan. Ketamakan dr para politisi2 yg telah mengorbankan nasib rakyat2 kecil, ketidakpedulian para pemimpin negara kita sendiri terhadap rakyat2nya dan juga ketidakpedulian bangsa kita sendiri*terlebih para kaum pelajar* terhadap nasib bangsanya yg sedang sekarat ini, serta kebodohan dr seluruh lapisan masyarakat, baik dari pemimpin, pejabat, politisi, para kaum terpelajar, sampai golongan rakyat2 kecil. Dan kita tidak pernah dapat melihat kesalahan2 kita, karena yg terpelajar telah dibutakan oleh kenyamanan dan kecukupan yg telah dimilikinya seorang, sang pemimpin dan pejabat telah dimakan oleh ketamakan dan perwujudan dr kepentingan2nya sendiri tanpa mempedulikan rakyatnya, dan kebodohan bangsa Indonesia yg sering sekali "lupa".

Nah, menurut saya sekarang, tidak banyak orang - orang yg bisa melangkah keluar dr kabut dan lingkaran setan itu di Indonesia ini. Kalaupun mereka berhasil keluar, mereka tetap kesulitan untuk membawa keluar saudara sebangsanya yg msh terjebak dalam kabut dan lingkaran setan itu. Gusdur *menurut saya* merupakan salah seorang yg telah berhasil keluar dari kedua perangkap itu. Gusdur berhasil mengingat "kenyataan historis" bangsa kita dan merefleksikannya, Ia telah berhasil mengatasi ketamakannya, *dan jelas* kepandaiannya pun bukan suatu hambatan baginya, kepeduliannya terhadap bangsa ini pun melebihi *bahkan menurut saya* semangat kepedulian all the politician's and all the parliaments' combine. Karena itu menurut saya, sangatlah sayang dia tidak menjabat sebagai presiden negara kita tercinta ini dalam waktu yang lebih lama.

Kesimpulannya teman2, apabila kita benar2 ingin keluar dari kabut tebal dan lingkaran setan ini, kita tidak boleh menjadi bangsa yang pelupa ! Sejarah adalah sumber kebijakasanaan ! Hanya dari sejarahlah kita bisa melihat segala keunggulan2 dan kesalahan2 yg telah kita perbuat. Karena itu janganlah pernah melupakan sejarah ! Lalu yang kedua, kita harus berani membela hak kita ! Jangan biarkan hak kita diselewengkan begitu saja, jangan mau dibodohi oleh para petinggi2 itu ! Siapa mereka dibandingkan kita yg 200 juta banyaknya ini ? Bahkan pemerintahan Belanda pun tak berkutik saat petani2 tebu bersatu dan melakukan boycott serta pembakaran lahan2 tebu secara diam2 ! Lalu, yang ketiga, kita sebagai generasi muda, janganlah terus2an menunggu untuk diberi tempat di pemerintahan sana. Berjuanglah untuk tempat dan kedudukanmu ! Sudah waktunya para politisi2 tua dengan pemikiran2 konservatif dan kolot itu disingkirkan dr jabatannya, mereka semua telah dibutakan oleh kesenangan duniawi yg telah mereka terima selama ini sehingga tidak ada lagi nasib rakyat di dalam pikiran mereka. Lalu yang keempat, kita sebagai anggota dari bangsa ini, tidak boleh berputus asa ! Putus asa adalah musuh kita ! Entah seberapa rusak dan damaged-nya bangsa dan negara kita ini, kita tidak boleh putus asa ! Teman2, negara kita ini umurnya baru 62 tahun ! Masih jauh dr kedewasaan, masih banyak yg harus dipelajari dan ditata. Jadi apabila sekarang kita melihat kenyataan amburadul dan kacau tentang negara kita ini, kita tidak boleh berpikiran bahwa itu artinya adalah akhir dari segalanya. Ini semua adalah bentuk dari suatu proses ! Proses yang dimana kita sebagai kaum terpelajar muda harus ikut andil, demi terwujudnya masa depan yg positif dr hasil proses tersebut !


Salam pantang menyerah,


Ruth

P.S. : sori kepanjangan...hehehehee...

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